Every year, I try to listen to Merzbow at least once, just in case this is the year I finally like it. No luck so far, but I'm not ready to give up on being the least fun person to talk to at your friend's next house show. I've recently reached the Einstürdzende Neubaten age, so anything is possible. In 2021, I filed BRNDA's Do You Like Salt? off in my "to be revisited" folder in my head. I wasn't a BRNDA listener before that point, and it didn't land for me on my first listen, but I could tell there was something there. I've since changed my opinion, and hold Do You Like Salt? as a core component of the New Wave/Surf Rock revival. Go listen to Year of the Hot Dog by Burger Gang or The Avocado from that record, though, and tell me what you think! You've got like a month to listen ahead of Total Pain.

The lead single from Total Pain did not come off my ear like a BRNDA song. It still doesn't, honestly. Peach Pit almost reads like a song by The Beths? Which would probably be a great point of comparison for the interplay between BRNDA's vocalists if it persisted beyond this song. The band's biggest talent is creating drastically different sounds, though, which is where this record really picks up momentum. Returning listeners know to expect this already, but this record actually takes a pretty significant genre tour from this point onward. Leah Gage's vocals on Peach Pit capture the feeling of walking around in a store in a strip mall that's on the other side of a Subway (the restaurant, not the transportation method). You can smell something familiar, but the sensations are very much new.

Once Peach Pit's two-and-a-half minute zig is up, we get our first zag of the record, as we immediately pivot from jangly twee punk to something that I can only describe as psychobilly Cake revival? For what it's worth, BRNDA's bandcamp tags use the genre "Art Punk" which I think is probably the best descriptor of the record as a whole, but I think the entire point of genre is to create such obscene descriptions in reviews that won't be read as "psychobilly-Cake-Revival." If you're having trouble getting on board with what I'm saying at any point in this review, I'd like to direct you to the chart below:

Figure 1: the Blenderman-Whig Scale

This isn't a rigorous scientific observation but should be helpful for understanding the space that this record occupies (although it regularly leaves that bubble, it's easiest for me to explain that way). Whig Boys is the next song I'm actually going to make a point to specifically talk about, because this song, a perpetual hand-off between Gage and counterpart Dave Lesser (I think?), is unbelievably fucking good. The vocals and surf rock guitar rhythms that dominate the first half of the song land it firmly on the B-52s end of the Blenderman-Whig scale (you'll understand when you hear it), but the second half of the song is something I do not believe I am equipped to describe to you with words. Gage delivers this stinging anti-consumerist rhythmic sing-song monologue over a twinkling surf-rock riff ad infinitum, while Lesser, with a vocal effect not unlike a subway announcer (the train this time), delivers a background reading about a rainbow almost lighter than air. This is a stand-out track, and has made the advance copy I received for pre-ordering the record an almost-daily listen at this point.

Returning fans of BRNDA will be happy to hear songs like MT Eyes and Everyone Chicago, which would've each fit in perfectly on Do You Like Salt?, but are elevated in a way that you would expect four years to bring. Mike Gillispie's flute solo on Everyone Chicago almost frames it like the main theme of a 70s crime/exploitation flick, while the vocals land it on the Whig end of the Blenderman-Whig Scale. It's important to me, though, that you don't think that this song sounds like a B-52s song just because it's on the Whig end of the scale. This song is its own thing. The flute solo and the guitars kinda give it a funky/crunchy vintage air, but Lesser's vocals here ring like a ringleader or a hypnotist. The single best point of comparison I have is Peter Hughes' vocals on some of the tracks on Super-Legera, which is not a helpful reference for anyone other than maybe Claremont Cometh. Everyone Chicago is so good that it, along with Whig Boys and Blenderman, drove me to write this review.

Go For Gold is a funky masterpiece. Nick Stavely's bassline here is so gnarly that it'll make you want to open up a pit and groove in it instead. My only complaint about this song, and it's one that I actually have at several points on this record, is that I want to hear so much more of each of these small vignettes that BRNDA gives us. Go For Gold is one of the longer songs on the record, clocking in just under 3.5 minutes, but I always leave it wanting twice as much of the final angelic 2000s city punk moments. I won't talk much about Zebra here, but you can check the chart for Zebra below.

Figure 2: Zebra on the Blenderman-Whig Scale

Cool Night is a soft detour, before bringing us to Blenderman, which you might recognize from the titular Blenderman-Whig scale (or as the second single from the promo-cycle, meaning you can hear it right now), is the most in-Beck-tious track on this entire record. The layered vocals in the chorus make it an instant earworm, while the lyrics (which I can actually read in front of me) keep me revisiting in hopes of making heads or tails of who, or what the Destructive Fortune Teller is. A Little Balloon enshrouds BRNDA in yet another genre, featuring another Gillispie flute solo. It is tender, shades of Orville-Pecksploitation. The album closer, My Mother, returns us to normalcy on the Whig end of the Blenderman-Whig scale.

Total Pain is a journey around genre in a way that feels at all times consistent and singular in its vision. None of these songs are stepping on each others toes, and despite the variety, nothing here feels like a gimmick. Several of the songs on this record are even logical next steps to ideas explored on Do You Like Salt?. For your consideration for Album of the Year 2025, BRNDA's Total Pain. Must listens when the album releases: Whig Boys, Everyone Chicago, Cool Night, and A Little Balloon. Listen to Peach Pit and Blenderman now over on BRNDA's Bandcamp. Were you looking for a number rating? What kind of a publication do you think this is? Get outta here.